The Circle

I've been pondering the circle of life of late...

the seasons we pass through, the ages and stages

and milestones which mark and imprint our lives.

I am part of what some have labeled the sandwich generation...

that age where we are raising children, and simultaneously

starting to worry about aging parents.

Well, yeah...
if we had ever been able to actually have  kids, I suppose.
That ship has sailed.

But the age remains the same, 

and the aging parents thing is looming large.

Objects in my rearview mirror are most definitely

larger than life, and approaching with what feels

like breakneck speed.

What if I'm not ready for them, though? The changes.

"la,la,la, I can't hear you" only works for so long, you know.

There is a beauty to the changing of the seasons,

to newness and rebirth, but a hesitancy and a denial almost 

of what must precede it...

there has to be a Good Friday 

before an Easter Sunday, after all.

A constant theme of late is the passage of time,

the ruthless, mercenary, onward march of life...

Days into weeks,

youth into middle age,

the cared for becoming the caretaker.
Cruel and inevitable, as day passes into night.

My faith has been shelved of late, but it's time to retrieve it.
The journey demands it,
and  I can't see myself
navigating these waters without it...

not with any degree of success, or...peace.

"Deliver us, Lord, from every evil, and grant us peace in our day.
In your mercy keep us free from sin and protect us from all anxiety..."

Yeah, God.
I give a hearty amen to all of that, but always feel that last part
is aimed squarely at me.

And so the wheels turn.
Slowly, steadily, fatefully.
The circle is formed, and a new season begins.

P.S.
please keep my mom in your prayers